


the one mistake you made was in your head

by asphodelgrimoire



Series: what's mine is yours to make your own [2]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dom/sub Undertones, M/M, Multi, Non-Sexual Submission, Punishment, alex and thomas have anxiety and aaron just wants them to be ok, and by undertones i mean aaron owns their asses, focus on Burr/Jefferson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-07
Updated: 2016-03-07
Packaged: 2018-05-25 06:51:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6184918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asphodelgrimoire/pseuds/asphodelgrimoire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aaron sighed. He wasn’t angry. That wasn’t the right word. Not even disappointed. He was worried. He just hated seeing Thomas’ wheels turning and coming up with twenty different things he could’ve said but didn’t. He hated to see the frustration brought on by disagreeing so vehemently with someone whom he used to consider his friend. </p><p>(or, Thomas is emotionally self-destructive and sometimes can't get out of the cycle on his own.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	the one mistake you made was in your head

**Author's Note:**

> okay so huge note here- no discussion takes place in this fic, but please know that this is all pre-negotiated
> 
> okay? okay.
> 
> title is from "how do you sleep" by john lennon

Thomas just wasn’t listening.

Aaron had sent him several warning looks over the course of his squabble with John Adams, but he didn’t acknowledge any of them, continuing to snap as though he was a buck locking horns with another. He may have been fighting a particularly paranoid anti-immigration buck, but it was still unnecessary. Adams was his friend at one point, and watching them tear at each other’s throats was simultaneously dull and upsetting. He worried his lip, looking between them as though it would mitigate the situation.

Unfortunately, it didn’t.

The fight lasted for a while until Adams huffed and threw his hands in the air. Aaron knew Thomas would take it as admitting defeat, but he was most likely just fed up with being badgered incessantly on a sidewalk when the temperature outside was in the mid-30s. He spat something, Aaron wasn’t truly paying attention, and then stomped off towards his dorm.

Thomas only allowed himself to return the huff when Adams was a safe distance away. He turned sharply on his heels towards the bench Aaron was sitting on, and honestly looked surprised.

As in, ‘oh I totally forgot that you were here’ surprised.

Aaron was irritated by it, to say the least.

He took a deep breath and looked up at Thomas, concealing his upset but not quite smiling.

“Do you wanna go back to the house, sweetheart?” Thomas asked with a frown. He was still very obviously seething with anger over the argument. When Aaron stood up, he was near enough to the man that he could feel the furious energy radiating off him like static underneath his skin. He hated that.

But he nodded anyway.

The walk back to Monticello was silent. They both shuffled in, glad to be in a heated room as opposed to the chilly street. Alexander was already there, on his laptop in the living room. Despite his fervent claims that he hated Thomas’ house, he seemed to be getting used to it just fine. Sank into the leather couch like he owned it and frequently walked around the house with a box of crackers or Chips-Ahoy, looking at the arches and windows like he was touring an art museum rather than walking around his second home in Thomas’ shirt and boxers.

He turned around and opened his mouth several times to say something, probably about Aaron’s deploring look or the way Thomas was glaring holes into the wall, but he blessedly restrained from doing so. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Aaron echoed softly and went over to him while Thomas went up the stairs with heavy footfalls. He sat down on the couch next to Alexander.

“What happened? Is he being a dick?” he immediately asked in a whisper once the other man was out of hearing range.

Aaron smiled tightly and combed his fingers through Alexander’s hair. “Not exactly. He needs a punishment though. It would be better if you stay out of it for now,” _because apparently Thomas and I need to have a talk,_ didn’t need to be said. Alexander made a small noise of understanding. “I’m not angry at either of you,” At that, he nodded, and Aaron gently tugged at the tips of his hair once to show his gratitude before getting up to follow Thomas to the bedroom. He would really have to treat Alex later- he always accepted it when he wasn’t included in things. Well, for Aaron and Thomas, at least. Anyone else, he couldn’t make any promises.

Aaron sighed. He wasn’t angry. That wasn’t the right word. Not even disappointed. He was worried. He just hated seeing Thomas’ wheels turning and coming up with twenty different things he _could’ve_ said but didn’t. He hated to see the frustration brought on by disagreeing so vehemently with someone whom he used to consider his friend. That was something that he and Alex had in common, even if they’d never admit it. The thing that bothered them most was not being able to convince someone that they were right, and even though it was partially about their ego, more times than not, the issue was that they really believed what they were saying and only wanted to inform people.

And the other issue was that those people thought they were already informed enough.

He sighed again as he reached the bedroom door. There was a good reason he didn’t talk much. Aaron lightly rapped his knuckles on the door before opening it. Thomas was there, as expected, having taken off his scarf and coat. He was pacing.

“Thomas,” The pacing didn’t stop, and the look on Thomas’ face grew more and more twisted as he probably reminded himself of every previous argument with Adams he’d ever had.

“Thomas,” he repeated, but when the other man only walked faster, Aaron lost patience quickly. He tramped over to the wall where Thomas was then headed and took hold of his hair at the roots when he was close enough. Thomas yelped briefly, almost doubling over to relieve the sting in his scalp (Aaron was short and didn’t give much leeway) and had no choice but to fall to his knees when Aaron pushed him down with a firm hand.

“ _Thomas,_ ” Aaron bit out through his teeth. He looked up, almost like he was confused as to how he got there. “Do I have your attention now?”

A nod. He was still tense. “Yes,” Thomas licked his lips, seemingly in anticipation for what he thought was going to come, but that wasn’t what this was about.

“Listen to me very clearly. I don’t like it when you fight with Adams, and I don’t think you do either. _Debating_ with Alex and practically every other person on campus and walking away with some sort of validation no worse for wear is different from agonizing over all the ways you think a _fight_ with someone after a falling out should have gone,” He tugs at Thomas’ hair again for good measure. “It hurts you to argue with him, and it hurts me to watch.”

That seemed to dull the hunger in his gaze substantially. His shoulders tensed even further, and his guilty eyes traveled up to meet Aaron’s as Thomas rested his head on his thigh. “I didn’t mean- I never wanted you to-“

But Aaron wasn’t quite done yet. He pulled harder to bring Thomas’ head back up to look at him. “Me? This isn’t about me. This is about you. Do your arguments with Alex upset you?”

“No, I-“

“Do your arguments with Adams upset you?”

“Yeah, but I have to- _somebody has to-_ “

Aaron yanked until his voice broke off with a hiss. “No, you don’t. You don’t have to do anything, Thomas. He’s not your responsibility,” His voice got softer. “You don’t have to suffer for people who’ve decided not to be in your life anymore.”

Thomas placed his head back on his thigh, and Aaron let him. “Yeah,” He could feel the man exhale and swallow heavily. “Yeah,” His shoulders sagged, partly in relief and partly in defeat. “I know.”

“Will you keep fighting Adams? I won’t try to stop you. I only ask that you don’t bring me along.”

Thomas shook his head and sighed, rolling his neck as Aaron soothed into his scalp with both thumbs. “No,” he breathes, wrapping around Aaron’s leg tightly and looking up at him with damp eyes. “Thank you, god, I’m just so tired.”

He didn’t ask about what exactly Thomas was tired of. Aaron only swatted his hands away and helped him up and onto the bed. After a moment of deliberation, he hunched forward to hug the man. Thomas ended up doing more of the hugging, being the bigger one, but Aaron just had to make sure that he was alright. He was so stubborn sometimes, trying to teach people his version of right and wrong, that he didn’t ever stop to remember that he was under no obligation to make them understand him. Alex had the same issue. Some people just didn’t want to understand him, and they never would. In Aaron’s private opinion (that he would never speak aloud,) they didn’t deserve to.

Now, in Adams’ case, Aaron really thought they’d get over their differences one day.

Just that it was unfortunately not that day.

He briefly drifted away from Thomas to the door only to call Alex in. The aforementioned man came rushing in, perhaps expecting something more than what he got.

“Alex, do you want to take a nap with us?” He nodded, even though he was obviously taken aback, quickly undressing and hopping into bed when he saw Thomas’ faintly red eyes. He curled in close to him, and Aaron truly knew that Thomas was tired when he didn’t even pretend like he was disgusted by Alexander’s proximity. He just tangled one hand with Aaron’s as soon as he’d gotten into pajamas, and tangled the other in Alex’s hair, making him purr.

“I can’t believe I’m in love with two know-it-all morons,” Aaron said when he pulled the covers up over himself. Suddenly, Thomas turned on his side, and Alex’s head peeked out from behind him to rest on his bicep, also turned towards Aaron.

“Ooh, he said he loved us,” Thomas fluttered his eyelashes, while Alex gasped dramatically.

“Fuck off,” he snorted, knowing that he was smiling too hard to sound threatening.

Alex grinned and reached over to grab Aaron’s other hand. “If it’s any consolation, we’re both wondering the same thing.”


End file.
